I JUST HAD AN EPIC BATTLE WITH A RACCOON!
I went out to feed ponehs dinner hay, (Dani managed to eat almost all her food so I didn't have to kill her) and there was a giant raccoon sitting on my "tackroom" shelf, it was horrifying and it was eating cookies.
Feeling annoyed since it had knocked everything off the shelf I threw some horse brushes at it and shouted a bit, it made horrible sounds back, then I went and fed horses hay and wondered what to do since J isn't home and couldn't shoot it.
Since no brilliant plan occurred to me I put on my big girl panties and did The Brave Thing, which was poke it with a dressage whip (not my sparkly one) and the Evil Raccoon made a horrible hissing noises and bit at the dressage whip a lot, then it launched itself at me. I screamed and screamed and it ran away.
I think it might have scared Sadie too because she is all trembling and big eyed. So we can tremble together under the blanket until J gets home from hockey.